WHAT IS INFIDELITY IN THE COUPLE?

​

The word infidelity reflects deception in a couple, with the breaking of the explicit and implicit pacts of the relationship and that correspond to respect, defend and maintain both emotional and sexual commitment with the couple.

​

It is practically breaking the trust of the couple, when secrets have been kept away from marital intimacy. In short, you are unfaithful to your partner when you lie to them consciously and knowing that this behavior is not correct.

​

Also marital infidelity can be seen as the result of a whole engagement process that was thought, desired and constant with third parties.

​

Such a process involves a series of behaviors that range from flirting, with expressions of affection and sometimes even sharing hours of entertainment together that would include watching a movie, having dinner and ending with a sexual act.

​

On occasions, it has been possible to continue loving a partner and additionally experience  attraction to another that would also include sexual interest, either because he/she feels submerged in a monotony, or due to the lack of new sensations in their own relationship or because they are simply pathologically unfaithful. 

​

CAN INFIDELITY BE FORGIVEN?

​

forgive an infidelity it is a very particular issue for each one who goes through this experience, so they must decide what is the most convenient and correct to continue with their life. 

​

Likewise, it is not like a clean slate, since that love that has existed for so many years, coexistence and plans already fulfilled or not, in addition to happy moments, also weigh in the balance and cannot be dismissed for a bad reason. unexpected and angry moment.

​

On the other hand, a pardon is only possible once the pain process has been overcome, which will lead to a loss of trust with the partner, the latter happens due to the devastating effects it has on the self-esteem of the victim who has gone through a situation of infidelity.

​

Nor can we speak of a "forgiveness" a priori, because forgiveness would lead to forgetting and such forgetting never ceases to exist, since it remains constant and repressed in the conscience of those who have had to go through infidelity.

​

The duality that occurs in this situation is that not forgiving an infidelity places a person in the situation of going through a practically unresolved mourning process and not as happens in a couple breakup, where the strong idea of leaving the unfaithful person and reinvent yourself with a new life and possible love.

 

NHowever, forgiving what happened also hurts and takes time, because a great effort must be made to leave behind any trace that causes negative feelings, such as anger, resentment, frustration and resentment.

​

COULD THE EFFECTS OF INFIDELITY BE REPAIRED?

​

• Perhaps it could happen, if the infidel expresses real regret and a genuine intention to repair that infidelity by assuming and demonstrating responsibility for his actions.

• Leaving denying their act of infidelity and insisting on lying, since that would show little respect to the couple who in this case is the victim of emotional damage.

• Failing to justify the  responsibility of such infidelity using the couple's defects.

• Demonstrate a change in a tangible, definitive and profound way that leads to the best intentions of a reconquest and the commitment not to repeat that damage.

• A great tolerance must be had with the time that the victim of that infidelity will take so that he can assimilate this reparation process.

• It should be very clear that only time is necessary for a reparation, since when people have been unfaithful they hope that the other or the other will immediately forget it and that everything will continue as before, and undoubtedly this requires years.

​

WHAT HAPPENS TO THE PERSON WHO FORGIVES INFIDELITY?

​

The doubt of an infidelity will always produce an emotional storm in the mind and feelings of those who feel cheated, cheated, as well as an inner discomfort caused by frustration and contradictory feelings towards the other person that range from love to hatred.

 

Perhaps it happens that the victim of infidelity stays in that relationship due to an intense attachment or emotional dependence and not because she has forgiven what happened, with this, it should be kept in mind that there will be a series of reproaches for years and the wound, although it can heal. , will always leave a scar that will be remembered as an indelible mark.

​

​